If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize