i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
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