Non-Jews are for practice
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
