I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
