ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
