his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize