she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
