I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Randomize
