She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I believe in your delicious
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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