Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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