We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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