I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Randomize
