First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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