you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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