I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize