I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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