guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
