After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
