Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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