She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I party with great urgency now.
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