I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
we should paint friendship bongs
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
