I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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