3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Randomize
