sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
