Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
