I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
this will be a night to untag.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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