I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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