i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
