He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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