Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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