you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
