He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
