never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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