We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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