Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
