I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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