Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
COCAINE IS GR8
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