her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Randomize
