What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
