i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize