If that was your dad, he is hot
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
