too bad you live with your parents still
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
