you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy�
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
