Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
