Dual....:-)
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
