Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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