erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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