oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
