Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
