How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
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